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The dilemma I am a year-old woman, married for three years, with three children under the age of four. Six weeks ago I discovered that my husband has been chatting to men online via Gaydar and other similar sites, and emailing one man in particular. When I confronted him he confessed he visited a gay sauna on four occasions while I was pregnant and started emailing a man he met there.

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Specifically, that gay pornography is overwhelmingly the most preferred and watched genre of pornography available. On their site, self identified females prefer gay pornography above all but one other genre of pornography on the site. So, everyone is asking, why the preference for male dominated gay pornography?

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Research published in the scientific journal Porn Studies has investigated the motivations behind women who watch male-on-male pornography. The findings suggest that some women enjoy gay content because it offers perspectives that mainstream heterosexual pornography lacks. Lucy Neville, a senior lecturer in criminology at Middlesex University, became interested in the topic of women who enjoy watching gay male sex thanks in part to the Game of Thrones book series.

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And the worst part often is that she is now deeply afraid this means he will leave her and that he may not ever have loved her. Through the eyes of our cultural conditioning, it certainly looks that way But the truth is that our fantasy lives often are radically different from our actual sex lives, in much the same way that our dreams are different from our waking life

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Many people contact Fight the New Drug to share their personal stories about how porn has affected their life or the life of a loved one. We consider these personal accounts very valuable because, while the science and research is powerful within its own right, personal accounts from real people seem to really hit home about the damage that pornography does to real lives. Some stories, like this one, shed light on the deep damage and unhealthiness that porn brings individuals and their relationships, and how porn makes for bad sex education.

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I remember one night when a group of us were out for drinks, and I met this straight guy. Our newsletters may contain promotional messages and special offers from our partners. These messages will be clearly identified.

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In it, Neville, a lecturer at the University of Leicester in the United Kingdom, investigates what women enjoy about consuming gay male erotica and how it fits in with their perceptions of gender and sexuality. Neville interviewed and surveyed more than women over five years for the project. It was interesting to find that half the sample had done that.

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Photo: Getty. Everyone has a different relation to their desires and everyone expresses those relations through unique identities, which are far more varied than the categories generally offered to us by society. It is my guess that a lot of straight guys consume gay porn.

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